One thing I haven’t talked much about is my videography and photography work. By the end of my Sophomore year, I’d been working with cameras for almost 6 years and was running up on my second year working on the media team at South Carolina.
I wasn’t intending on doing summer staff again with Young Life, so on a whim I decided to apply for a video intern position at Sharptop Cove. They got back to me within a month or so to notify me they had chosen someone else. A few weeks later, two other Young Life camps reached out asking me to come work, one was camp Buckner in Texas and the other was a camp in Scotland. Neither could pay me and at the time I wouldn’t have been able to afford it without my parents so I turned both offers down.
With the idea that I’d be finding a random summer job in Columbia, I continued through March without thinking about video interning. That was until I received an email from Carolina Point, who were in desperate need to fill their Summer Video Intern position. The email said they’d been referred my name, and for a little while I assumed my parents had thrown my name to some of the staff since they just so happened to attend the same church in Brevard, but that was not the case. That same day I got on the phone with one of the staff members, he was part of the Guest Services staff at Carolina Point and was in charge of the video situation. Over the phone we chatted about the job and he told me the intern who was originally in the position was leaving early to get married, so they needed to secure the position quickly. We talked more about Brevard and I mentioned my parents since they knew of each other but he didn’t know I was their son. To me it seemed like he was giving me the job right then and there. At the time though, I had a few requirements for myself before even knowing about the job. My Young Life team leader and I had a number of talks leading up to that summer about growth and the need for a good mentor in my life. This was a big focus moving into summer 2018 and I had intended to start linking up with my YL area director to begin some kind of mentorship. So that being said, I had some serious questions regarding that. Two specific questions actually. The first being wether or not I’d have community while I was there. And that may be a silly question considering it’s a Young Life camp, but you’d be surprised. The second question was wether or not I’d have some type of mentor there. He assured me there’d be both. So a few weeks later I flew out to Colorado for video training where all the video interns from across the country underwent intense training on ethics, requirements, standards, and equality along with technical training in Final Cut Pro.
On May 10th I moved into Carolina Point. I went with the expectation that I’d be in a little dorm with a few other guys, similar to work crew and summer staff. There were 10 guy interns and we lived in a space called The Brew at the top of the mountain behind the adult guest lodge on the edge of camp property, about a minute or so drive away from camp itself. It was called The Brew because it had once been used as a home brewery by the former owner of the property where the adult guest lodge was located. About the size of a garage and a half, The Brew housed all 10 of us. There was a kitchen that was about 20 square feet with a fridge chock full of Lord knows what. We also had one bathroom and two showers, one of which was outside. I was the last to arrive at camp and when I first walked in I was met with some greetings alongside the smell of Wintergreen and mango Juul pod. There wasn’t much space to walk with everyone moving in so I just threw the few things I had onto the last open bed, a top bunk in the middle of the room. None of that really bothered me though, the guys all seemed cool.
It was established pretty soon that I was the youngest by a little over a year. I was 19 at the time. It also wasn’t long before a few jokes like, “Oh so you’re the replacement.” started rolling through. Referring to the yearlong intern who’d left to get married and from what I heard he was a really great guy! Those first few days getting to know everyone was fun! The first few weeks before campers arrived was all hands on deck to get last minute work done on camp, so just a ton of sod and sand being moved after some construction projects had recently finished on camp. I did get a day off the first weekend though to go to my sisters graduation back in Columbia.
The first few weeks were good while I got to meet everyone and make friends. We also started our weekly intern time with the camp director and his wife. Each week we’d get together at their house in town, the first two months we spent telling testimonies. I told mine at the first meeting because I wanted everyone to know who I was and that I wanted to be real about community that summer, I cried telling it. And from that experience, I was hopeful for the summer with everyone that surrounded me.
Once camp started and everyone began their regular jobs we all kinda figured out our routines. And thanks to our schedules there were never really discrepancies over bathroom or shower usage. With video, my schedule normally started around 8-830 every day getting equipment ready and depending on the day, I’d shoot from 9-11:30 and 1-3 depending on what events were happening. I’d usually skip lunch to get ahead on editing, unless it was chicken sandwich day which was Wednesdays or on pool Olympics day too since I liked the burgers. And on most days I’d finish editing that days video by 5ish where I’d then take the hard drive to Samuel, our sound tech, for it to be downloaded for club that night. I’d attend every event with the exception of the Square Dance during normal weeks and to try and get the next days video started, I’d edit late and usually be back in bed by 11 where everyone was usually already asleep.
I worked alone on my job and only ever interacted with the other interns at intern time and at meals. It was rare for me to make it to The Brew before everyone had gone to sleep unless it was my off day, which was Saturdays.
Pretty quickly though, a few of the guys developed some pretty negative attitudes towards their jobs, and in the little time I had around them they seemed to complain a lot. It wasn’t even complaining about bad things, it was really just about them doing the jobs they’d applied for. We were worked like dogs but that was part of the job description. We were called to serve the campers and were still paid to do so. I never understood their complaints as I’d been working 10+ hour days alone. It just didn’t make sense.
It didn’t take long for me to become the little brother of the group, this had its pros and cons, one of the cons was becoming the verbal punching bag for a few of the guys. I never intended to retaliate though, I didn’t feel entitled to know their struggles and it was much easier to ignore than to try and back myself up against 5 to 6 guys who were all older than me. I knew I was there for a reason and I intended to work through the end. I loved what I was doing and loved the campers even more, how could I not? I had been in their position years before when I was in high school and I intended to do my part.
My birthday rolled around halfway through the summer so Mom and Dad wanted to host the interns on my off day for my birthday. So we did. The interns had all joined me at my parents house once at the beginning of the summer for a cookout because I wanted to get our community rolling as soon as possible so most of them were adamant about going back that Saturday. A majority of the interns joined us at the house, the ones that didn’t though had to work that night and couldn’t make it. Anna had also driven up from Greenville to come too which I was excited about. We did a Low Country Boil and just hung out around the house and in the backyard. It was a good little break from the chaos. Not too long after we started eating, one of the guy interns showed up, we’ll call him C. He had his regular bad attitude coming straight off his job but I ignored it. Mom went to offer him food just letting him know that there was plenty available. He met her with an attitude saying, “No I’m late everyone is about to leave anyways.” And was just outright disrespectful to my Mom, she even came up to ask what his problem was and I just asked her to ignore it. It wasn’t but a few minutes after that where he got in his car and left. I told Mom he’d probably just had a bad day at work. I figured something had happened so I just forgot about it. A few hours later, everyone left. I hung out with Anna for a little while with my sister and after Anna left I headed back to camp. Overall it had been a good day and I was happy to have hosted them for my birthday.
I got back to The Brew around 9, which was the earliest I’d been back most of the summer. I got in my bed and put my headphones in and planned on reading my book until I went to bed. But it was hard to from all the yelling around the room from the guys. Their typical headassery shenanigans all trying to annoy one another, it was always the same few guys messing with one another. They never really messed with the rest of us.
I took my headphones out since I was already distracted. And to no surprise, C was running around acting a fool. However, nobody was really in the mood after dinner and most of us were trying to relax anyways. But C wasn’t having it, so stole the phone of one of the other guys trying to get him to chase. Yeah this 23 or 24 year old guy was running around the room with someones phone trying to get him to chase. The guy wasn’t playing so he went to C’s cubby and grabbed the first thing he saw, which was a taser he had sitting out. C immediately got upset and swapped the phone for the taser. Once C had the taser, he took it out the case and said, “Alright, every one of you motherfuckers is getting tased, starting with you.” Referring to me.
All the guys were telling C to sit and go to bed and were all annoyed at this point. So I told C, tired of his shit, “Touch me with that taser and I’ll knock you the fuck out.” I hadn’t snapped on anyone that whole summer but this had sent me a little after the way he spoke to my Mom at the house. This got the room silent and prompted C to say, “Oh the baby wants to talk big now?” saying stuff like, “You won’t do shit.” And in all honesty, I wouldn’t, I was just annoyed and wanted to ignore him. But then, C climbed up to my bed where he whipped his nuts out and started wiping them on my bed frame saying, “Oh you like that shit? This is mine now.” I ignored him, still annoyed. When he realized he wasn’t getting a reaction he got up into my bed where he got behind me, stood over my head and started T-bagging me. This just pissed me off so I told him to get off, but for some reason he thought that meant I wanted more. So he got in front of me acting like he was gonna put me in a headlock. I figured he wasn’t going to do anything so I didn’t push back when he wrapped his arm around my neck. I said and did nothing assuming he’d let go or that the other guys would intervene, neither happened. I couldn’t breathe anymore when he started squeezing harder and realized nobody was going to help, so I punched him in his side, then in the face without looking. He let go and I immediately got over him with a fist just waiting. But instead I sat back in my bed and said, “Get out of my bed.” And after he’d wiped that cowardly look off his face, he straightened his glasses and stood over me trying to get me to fight saying, “You fucking coward, you can’t do shit, fight me like a man, you’re nothing, punch me, come on coward.”
I was in the perfect position to make that happen, everything in me wanted to fight but all I could think about was the campers and my job when I was about to fight. And all I said to C was, “Why? Why are you doing this?” a question that I meant in two ways, why was he acting this way and why was he at Carolina Point in the first place if this is how he was acting. He kept going on cussing me out and calling me a coward trying to get me to fight when he finally got down and stormed out the room still trash talking. None of the other guys that were in the room spoke up, until one looked at me to say, “Alright bro, chill out.”
I texted the guy that hired me that night telling him we needed to talk, so we met in his office at 7 the next morning. I told him everything and he then asked, “Did you apologize to C?” Making it sound as if it was my fault. I said no, and he told me to do so saying that we wouldn’t be able to get anywhere without apology first. So that night I went and stooped down to C’s bed and apologized saying I’d overreacted. He didn’t look at me and just said, “Yeah you’re right.” So I just said ok to myself and went to bed. I assumed that when I told the guy who hired me how he responded, something would be done. But when I told him, he just told me to leave it and go back to my job. At that point I’d moved past the fact I wouldn’t have a mentor, and the community that was there wouldn’t be much use. But nevertheless, I had a job to do that I still loved and people to serve that I loved even more. So in the midst of all that I chose to forget about the rest and commit further to the work. Every off day from that point I was making the 3 hour drive to Columbia to pack up and move out of the Retreat since I didn’t have time to finish packing before camp since the job had come up so suddenly. And along the way I was able to update the boys on everything, I didn’t want to tell Mom, Dad or my sister yet though. And thankfully Anna was helping lead a group of Young Life Capernaum kids towards the end of July. She and I got time to hang during the day while I edited and this gave me much needed time to vent about everything. I don’t think I would’ve made it through the summer without that.
I’d also gotten the chance to talk to a few other interns about stuff. I still liked a lot of the others I worked with and still have relationships with them now, they were always supportive and I love them greatly for that. Towards the end of the summer, I still had a majority of stuff to move out of the Retreat and was pressed for time since the end of my lease there was coming up. I went to the guy who hired me asking if I’d be able to leave two weeks early since the last two weeks of camp were for a different organization and wouldn’t have a video intern. He told me he’d think about it and get back to me, he was gone the following week for vacation. And when he got back he told me it wasn’t his decision and that I’d have to go talk to the camp director. I went to him and asked. He was curious why I wanted to leave and if there were other reasons. I told him that C and I had gotten into a fight but didn’t tell any details. I also told him that I felt like I hasn’t gotten what I was promised in a community or in mentorship. He told me he’d think about it and a few days later he told me I could leave a week early, giving me just enough time to do what I needed.
Just because I was able to leave early didn’t meant that I was sad to go. The morning I left I got emotional because I was still grateful for the chance I was given to serve, and also for the wonderful people I got to meet throughout that summer. But there was also a sense that I was returning home as a different person. That was scary to me. I ended up staying at the house in Brevard for two nights since Mom and Dad were out of town, so Josiah came up for a night to hang and to have some roommate time since we were moving in together into a new place that following week.
The next night when Mom and Dad got back, they were eager to hear how the summer had gone. I felt an obligation to tell them about everything. So I did. I talked about the lack of community and the negativity and, at first, I was hesitant to tell them what had happened with C. But I did anyways. I told them how nothing had been done and how it seemed as if it was just pushed under the rug. It really didn’t bother me at that point as I’d kinda pushed it down. But my parents were furious. I explicitly told them not to talk to anyone about it since they knew most of the Carolina Point staff and were heavily involved in Brevard Young Life.
Earlier that same day, I’d received an urgent text from Greg asking to call him. I assumed there was something I’d forgotten for video and that they needed something. But to my surprise, Greg picked up the phone saying that someone had told him all about the fight between C and I. On the phone he asked, waiting for my answers, “Is it true he pulled a taser out on you? Is it true he wiped his testicles on your bed? Is it true he stood over you and wiped them on your head? Is it true he put you in a headlock and tried to knock you out? Is it true you punched him? Is it true he proceeded to curse at you calling you a coward?” All to which I responded, “Yes.”
He told me over the phone that someone had approached him and told him everything and that on behalf of him and the rest of staff, they were sorry. He assured me he would be handling the problem and that he was thankful for me coming that summer. I told him thank you and we hung up. And later that night, along with everything else, I told Mom and Dad.
I was leaving to go to Columbia the next morning but decided to drive into town to say bye to Mom first. That morning she had brunch with one of the Brevard Young Life staff Women, whose husband just so happened work in the office at Carolina Point. Mom had asked me that morning if it was ok for her to tell the staff woman what I’d told her and I said yes. The staff woman then told Mom that her husband heard the camp director practically interrogating every male intern the previous evening. Yelling louder than he’d ever heard him before.
I went back to Columbia that day knowing I’d changed a lot that summer, and more than anything I just wanted to forget what had happened along with the way I felt about the whole ordeal. I was angry and had begun to develop a hatred for Young Life. But I believed the right thing would be done in the end.
The morning after I moved back in Columbia I got another text from the camp director asking to call him. He picked up the phone telling me that he’d talked to the interns and that they had all denied anything happening. I didn’t know how to respond. I told him again the guys that had been in the room and he told me that they all denied it except C, who said that I’d overreacted. I thanked the camp director for looking into it, then hung up. I felt cheated. I was angry and sad at the same time. Also because C was set to start a year-long internship at Young Life Timberwolf in January.
After that call, something changed in me. No longer did I feel like the quiet Mr. Nice Guy who wanted to love and be around people. I wasn’t going to take anymore shit from anyone. I said things and did things the way I wanted and spoke my mind with no regards to others. My purpose still was to serve and still I led Young Life, but as the image and idea of the ministry remained in me, the heart left. And my new self, headstrong with no consideration for others emotions, became the forefront for what my Junior year of college would become.
Who told him? Where’d they go?